Wednesday, February 4, 2009

Funemployment, Day Sixty Three: Things I Don't Miss, part three


things i don't miss about working, part three: being "tasked" to do something. this corporate buzzword ranks right up there with "circle back" and "take offline" in cringe-worthiness.

first off, that can't be a real world! "task" is but "being tasked" has got to be some godawful phrase someone way up the chain made up to make underlings feel better about being ordered to do something.

second, it never works. nobody feels better about being tasked to do something. we get it, we do what you say because you pay us. we're okay with that, and no buzzword and a chipper voice will make us feel like we've been anointed by the almighty to staple the covers to all those TPS reports.

third, has anyone ever been tasked to do something enjoyable? "hey, sparky, i'm tasking you to take the company jet to barbados to see how long it takes! no need to hurry back, just expense it." if you want us to feel privileged to perform the task you're tasking us with, it shouldn't need to be tasked in the first place. we should want to volunteer! so quit with the b.s. and happy face and trying to get us all excited to add a few more grids and a few more hours to our day.

i don't know why that popped into my head on the way to the gym this morning but when it did i had an involuntary shudder and rolling of the eyes, much like i did back in my unemployed days. maybe it's still the PDSD (post-disney stress disorder). thanks for letting me vent and go get back to whatever you've been tasked with today.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Funemployment, Day Sixty Two: A Grand Slam!

So Operation Grand Slam was a success and i'm now at the gym trying to work off the 6,500 calories i just inhaled. this is proving difficult, however, as i'm quickly slipping into a pancake/egg/bacon/sausage coma. damn you, denny's!

i also got to ride the elevator with adam sanderson who apparenty doesn't feel the need to get to work early. and judging by the spandex i'm guessing he's not here working off his free grand slam breakfast. i'm guessing he doesn't know what "denny's" is.

okay, must crawl next door for primo double espresso before falling asleep on the treadmill, which could be deadly. funny as hell when i'm flying off it, but deadly. :)

Mission accomplished. I'm fat and

Mission accomplished. I'm fat and happy and back to my car before they start enforcing meters. All told i'm out $4.15 including coffee and tip.:)

So i'm at a window

So i'm at a window seat and am pissing off people in line everytime i stop eating to post on my storm. Heh heh...

Yep, free food tastes better

Yep, free food tastes better than paid food. Even tho the eggs r "eggs" in the same gelatinous way trimana's "eggs" r i'm still loving 'em.

Mmm...can't post...eating...

Mmm...can't post...eating...

Ahh! Finally seated inside and

Ahh! Finally seated inside and so happy! Unlike some a-holes who have the nerve to complain that service is slow when they're getting a free meal